Why I Wanted To Run Away From Bible Study

I don’t know what was more intimidating, the ice sculpture or the perfectly-dressed ladies. Both of these greeted me as I walked into the church. This particular morning was the introduction to women’s Bible studies. I would pick up the Bible study book, meet others who were also interested, and hear from a speaker. As I walked into the church, I wanted to run the other way.  I had just returned from several years of living internationally with a very simple lifestyle. My grid for evaluating any situation was a little different to say the least. Just the size of the foyer completely overwhelmed me. I came into church by myself. Alone. I quickly realized that everyone else came in with a friend.  I didn’t know where to go, wasn’t sure I wanted to be there, and definitely didn’t want to experience this situation again. My one thought was, “Why does Bible study have to feel so uncomfortable.”

Have you ever had an experience like this? You know, the kind where your heart is racing, you break out into a sweat, and you feel so confused because in trying to do something right, it suddenly feels very isolating. But moments like these can forge new paths in our lives. My question that lingered was, How many other women feel this way? Could we do it differently?

Motivated by that experience, I wanted to try a new approach. Beginning a Bible study in my neighborhood seemed daunting yet intriguing to me. But I knew that someone reaching out to me and asking me to come seemed very kind and soft. The invitation from a voice rather than an announcement felt caring and compassionate. Could this be what the Lord wanted me to do?

Now for my excuses: 

1. I’m not a gifted teacher.
2. What if no one comes?
3. What if someone asks a question I can’t answer?
4. I’m not super organized.
5. I don’t have a nice enough house.

All of them were about my insecurities. My doubts were ever before me. But in the inner workings of my heart the Lord was impressing me to step out in faith and trust Him anyway.

So I uttered my favorite prayer, “Lord, help me!”

I sat with a pen and journal and wrote out all my fears. I decided to X over them and ask God for more faith and then begin.

And now, 14 years after that moment, neighborhood ministry is still continuing. God has done amazing things. His love has changed lives. His kingdom has grown.

Is it still possible to reach neighbors even during COVID?

Our NBS2GO team has compiled a small list of what we are currently doing.

1. Jackie just started a Bible study in her Arkansas neighborhood. She invited the women to a Zoom call and began using the LIGHT 2GO study. (Jackie is 8 months pregnant and has 2 year-old twins at home.)
2. Linda has continued her neighbor Bible study without missing a week. The 50-80 year-olds have all learned to use Zoom and meet every Friday morning.
3. Sherri started driveway dinners this past summer and the women asked if she could lead a Bible study! They met outside for as long as the weather permitted and only recently moved to Zoom calls.
4. Melody has focused on praying walking in her neighborhood with her son and dog close by. She is committed to ministering to whomever is in her path as she walks.
5. And me…I started a YouVersion NBS2GO Bible study with family members as well as continuing my neighborhood ministry.

As you face 2021, what will it look like for you?  Is active faith on your agenda? In 14 years will you have a story of faith to share? Let’s all begin this year with my favorite prayer, “Lord, help me!” Drop us a note and let us know how we can pray for you and if you want any help getting started!